Poignant thoughts
by BlueSpindle
Summary: Rated T 'cause I said so. The fall of Alice Academy. The thoughts of someone left behind. A short one-shot about the thoughts of a forsaken student. R&R. Flames are also delicious - chie


A very short one-shot from your local self-proclaimed hikikomori. I did this out of whim. Don't expect too much, just read on and tell me what you think. This is my first one-shot in such a long time, so forgive me if there are any errors or this is just too lame to read.

_**Flames are also delicious no matter how bitter they are **__~Chie-sensei_

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It's been three years since the fall of Alice Academy. I didn't expect the mission to fail. No. Actually, everybody knew I would fail, yet why did I go? Is it my stubbornness? Is it the fact that I wanted to prove that I'm not stupid and naive? Is it because I was being depended on for the first time that I felt like I could do anything and not fail? Such ridiculous thoughts, now that I think back. How could a person not fail? Nobody's perfect. That clichéd line is so true. I hated the fact that I was too dense. I hated the fact that I was too blind to face reality when I already knew that it was impossible to continue. Yet...why? Was it because he was there?

Him. Who was he? The person who haunted my dreams whenever I sleep. He who always managed to keep his composure and that emotionless look on his face. Was he my lover? Was he my enemy? Was he my friend? These memories are still intact, yet I've buried them for so long that even time has helped me forget about it. Everyone I know turned their backs on me. Even my best friend. She's not even worth the title "best friend" anymore. No. She's now a traitor. A traitor who lied to me so many times that I've already lost count. I still remember her pity for me, her mocking words, her despicable taunts. Ah. The memories of the past are coming back. God, please let these memories fade away. I don't want to remember anything right now. I only want to think about the past. I don't want to keep these memories. Let me think about them and slowly, please, take them away. Lock them somewhere where even the rays of the sun won't shine. After that, I will start a new life. A new life without the past. To be reborn. To face a new world.

I stayed silent for an hour. Another hour. And as the sun had set. I sat there. Underneath the wilted sakura tree, where we...Dammit! The past is too heavy. Maybe I should end it. Maybe it's already time. The dead sakura tree. It's trunk is already dry. Dry like my heart. I wish that I could turn b--

"NO!" I shouted. I angrily stood up. Took a few heavy steps. And ran straight to the sakura tree, only stopping before I actually hit it. "I'm such a coward," this is true. I ran away after the failure. I hid from my friends. I cut all ties with everyone I knew. I ran away. I was too scared of what awaited after I blew the mission. I ran away.

"I guess this is enough," I talked to the sakura tree as if it was the only being that could listen to me and understand me. "Everything," I paused. I felt a warm trail of liquid making its way down my cheeks. It took me by surprise. Tears. "Ahahahahaha!" I laughed at myself. "How can I cry?! I'm such a coward!! Ahahahahaha!" I exclaimed. How pitiful I was, sitting there in my tattered clothes. Sitting underneath the sakura tree.

I took out my last hope. The only thing that could free me from this world devoid of happiness. Ah. A small knife. The one thing that could save me. Just a slit will do. Yes. A slit on the wrist. What's so bad about that? It's a simple thing. A slit. And I'll just have to wait out until I die. What more could there be?

I'm not scared of this. I'm not! I can do this without fail. I can. And I will.

I slowly neared the small knife to my left wrist. Just a bit more. Just…

-brrrriiiiiiiiiiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnnnggggggg-

"LET ME DIE!!!!!!!!!"

-laughter in the background-

"Oi! What are you doing?"

I turned to look at the person…

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_*sigh* _

**B**ite me.

**F**lame me.

**P**raise me.

**K**ick me.

**L**ove me.

**H**ate me.

Comment/review whatever you want. You have the freedom. If you didn't like it, say so. I thank you for reading this crap.

- akkichi-sensei / a.k.a chie-sensei


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